Well I saw the Simpsons yesterday, and i saw the Chipmunks preview *shudder*...

Well, it's a lot scarier than I thought would be... I mean, the chipmunks barely fit into the environment. It's... odd.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Smurfs_%28film%29

I always feel like singing Crawling after reading this topic...>_<

Edited by Black Dranzer.exe on July 30, 2007 at 16:24:02.

The Smurfs.

The Smurfs?

THE ****ING SMURFS?!

...Jessica Simpson?

Sweet Jesus, the Smurfs? The world truly is coming to an end...

Sierra just signed a deal with Dreamworks to make a Spyro the Dragon movie, too. But then again that could go either way.

Good god, a Duke Nukem movie? A Metroid movie sounds fun.

It can only be a true Duke Nukem movie if it is in the right city.

So, L.A. then?

I'VE GOT BALLS OF STEEL!

Worst 10 movies ever? Here they are, with the official synopses (The ones where they give the movie too much praise)

10. Half Past Dead

An undercover FBI agent, Sascha Petrosevitch (Steven Seagal), takes bullets for his buddy, Nick Frazier (Ja Rule). Nick figures Sascha for dead until the two are reunited again on duty at New Alcatraz (a hellish, high-tech version of the now-defunct prison). At New Alcatraz, criminal mastermind Lester (Bruce Weitz) is set to be executed. Lester knows the whereabouts of a fortune in gold, but isn't talking. With only hours to live, Lester takes a meeting with Sascha, just as corrupt prison official Donny (Morris Chestnut) and his gang (including Nia Peebles) raid New Alcatraz by helicopter and take Lester and a Supreme Court justice hostage. Highly energetic action scenes pay respect to the films of John Woo, and director Don Michael Paul makes many tasteful choices in the film's editing and music.

9. The Master of Disguise

The hilarious Dana Carvey showcases his dazzling impersonation skills in MASTER OF DISGUISE, a comedy about an innocent man who discovers that he has a rare, though mildly annoying, gift. Carvey is Pistachio Disguisey, a waiter who is plagued by the bad habit of impersonating the people he serves. He is constantly taking on alternate identities but cannot figure out why he feels so compelled to imitate other people. That is, until he learns that it's a genetic trait in the Disguisey family, shared even by his grandfather. When his parents are kidnapped, Pistachio realizes that to return them to safety, he must become a true Master of Disguise. With the aid of his beautiful new assistant, Jennifer (Jennifer Esposito), Pistachio embarks on his mission, portraying a variety of outrageous characters in order to get closer to the evil Devlin Bowman (Brent Spiner) and free his parents (James Brolin and Edie McClurg) from their deadly fate. Carvey and co-screenwriter Harris Goldberg use their lighthearted premise to parody any and every subject that gets in their way, from ethnic culture to pop culture. The result is a breezy affair that never takes itself too seriously. THE MASTER OF DISGUISE also includes cameos by Bo Derek, Michael Johnson, Jesse Ventura, and Jessica Simpson.

8. Twisted

Against the moody, fog-laden backdrop of the San Francisco waterfront, police detective Jessica Shephard (Ashley Judd) becomes embroiled in a darkly personal hunt for a serial killer in this Hitchcockian psychological thriller directed by Philip Kaufman (THE UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF BEING, QUILLS). Jessica, a San Francisco street cop, has been appointed detective by Police Commissioner John Mills (Samuel L. Jackson), her surrogate father and mentor. Together with her new partner Mike Delmarco (Andy Garcia), she goes after her first assignment, a murder, and is ready for anything until she realizes that the corpse is a man she once slept with. What seems like a bizarre coincidence becomes all too suspicious when the next murder victim is also an acquaintance of the police detective--who is also a blackout drinker with an appetite for anonymous, rough sex. Nightly she returns home, drinks a glass of red wine, and awakens to the news of another victim. Haunted by her own family tragedy (her father went on an insane killing spree and killed her own mother and himself), Jessica begins to doubt her own sanity and suspect herself to be the killer.

7. National Lampoon's Gold Diggers

National Lampoon's Gold Diggers, breaks new comedic ground for National Lampoon, as it explores the misadventures of two completely incompetent con men, who, in desperation, turn their attention to the art of gold digging. First time director Gary Preisler directs the cast of Will Friedle (BOY MEETS WORLD), Chris Owen (AMERICAN PIE 1 and 2), Nikki Ziering (AMERICAN WEDDING), Louise Lasser (REQUIEM FOR A DREAM) and Renee Taylor (THE NANNY, ALFIE).

Cal (Friedle) and Lenny (Owen) are two con men who dream of the fabled “good life” that includes big bucks, cool parties, fast cars and hot women, especially dream girl Charlene (Ziering). After a string of failed robbery attempts including a purse snatching that goes terribly wrong, Cal and Lenny turn to gold digging. Their scheme is to marry the aging and inseparable Mundt sisters, Doris (Lasser) and Betty (Taylor), who the boys met after unsuccessfully trying to mug them. While courting the women in hopes of inheriting their Beverly Hills estate, Cal and Lenny learn that the sisters' apparent fortune came from their father's innovative use of a sausage casing back in the 20s, which resulted in the world's first condom. Unbeknownst to Cal and Lenny, the Mundt sisters have lost their condom fortune, are now destitute, and are only marrying the guys so that they can knock off their young suitors and collect on their new, generous life insurance policies. Within weeks the couples are wed, culminating in an absurdly comical honeymoon night.

Once the honeymoon is over, and Cal and Lenny come out from hiding, they find themselves in a living hell. Betty and Doris are in much better shape, with much stronger libidos, than they could have ever imagined. In short, the sisters won't be dying any time soon. If they are ever going to inherit the estate and wind up with the life they've so badly dreamed of, the guys will have to speed up the Mundt sisters' natural aging process. The sisters, using their new copy of “Murder for Dummies”, need to get rid of the guys before Cal and Lenny realize that they have once again been duped.

After a series of mangled murder attempts, Cal and Lenny, Betty and Doris wind up getting exactly what they had hoped for; LOVE, SEX, MONEY AND HAPPINESS – just not in the way they expected. In the end, after a series of unexpected developments, the now wealthy Cal spends a glorious night with his dream girl Charlene. With a roaring fireplace, a bearskin rug, his dream girl and a mansion, Cal has everything he's dreamed of, while Charlene quietly begins to make her own gold digging plans for Cal's newly acquired fortune.

6. Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2

Baby Geniuses 2: Superbabies is the sequel to the hit 1999 TriStar Pictures release Baby Geniuses starring Kathleen Turner and Christopher Lloyd, whose characters secretly worked to crack the code to “baby talk,” a highly sophisticated language that allows babies to communicate their innate knowledge of the secrets of the universe.

In Baby Geniuses 2: Superbabies, the adventure continues with a new generation of talking toddlers. This time, the baby geniuses find themselves at the center of a nefarious scheme led by powerful media mogul Bill Biscane (Jon Voight). Joining the babies in their battle against evil is a legendary baby named Kahuna (Leo, Myles and Gerry Fitzgerald). Part ultra-cool spy, part superhero, Kahuna joins babies Archie (Michael & Max Iles), Finkleman (Jordan & Jared Scheideman), Alex (Joshua & Maxwell Lockhart) and Rosita (Keana & Maia Bastidas) in a race against time to stop the villainous Biscane from using his state-of-the-art satellite system to control the minds of the world’s population. -- © Sony Pictures Entertainment

5. King's Ransom

Anthony Anderson sheds his usual sidekick status, heading up the ensemble cast of this farcical romp as Malcolm King, a boorish, egomaniacal billionaire who owns a huge, equally tasteless marketing firm in Chicago. The cocky businessman is quickly established as the kind of character audiences love to hate, insulting underlings with glee and emitting crass vulgarities whenever he opens his mouth. His lovable secretary Miss Gladys (Loretta Devine) tries to keep him in line, while his uber-ditz of an administrative assistant, Peaches (Regina King, SCARY MOVIE), keeps him satisfied. Kellita Smith (THE BERNIE MAC SHOW) plays Malcolm's gold-digging wife, who is sleeping with her hunky, though stuttering, pool boy (Roger Cross) while seeking a hefty divorce settlement. The cast is rounded out by Angela (Nicole Ari Parker, SOUL FOOD), the temporary VP who is passed up for the job in favor of the boss's mistress, and Corey (Jay Mohr, LAST COMIC STANDING), a loser who lives in his grandmother's basement; his gang banger sister intimidates him into taking part in criminal activities. Resentments toward King abound, and soon everyone gets the same idea: kidnap Malcolm, take him for all he's worth, and teach him a valuable lesson. Even the big man himself decides to orchestrate his own kidnapping, in order to throw a wrench in the plans of his wife's lawyer. A cacophony of mistaken identities, misunderstandings, and general mayhem ensues, during which time the supporting cast is given a chance to shine; in particular, Jay Mohr deftly handles a violent run-in with a fast food worker with hilarious results. Donald Faison (SCRUBS) and Charlie Murphy (CHAPPELLE'S SHOW) also turn in stellar performances, as a randy parking attendant and a growling ex-con on the down low.

4. Pinocchio (the 2002 one)

Roberto Benigni (LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL) brings Carlo Collodi's classic children's story to glorious life in this big budget live-action adaptation. Gepetto (Carlo Guiffre), a humble toy maker, fashions a marionette out of a log that has miraculously appeared on his doorstep. After wishing upon a star that his creation, Pinocchio (Benigni), would come to life, Gepetto's wish is granted by the beautiful Blue Fairy (Nicoletta Braschi). The only condition is that Pinocchio must prove his valor, and be completely honest at all times, in order to become a real boy. Unfortunately, this isn't easy for the enthusiastic puppet, who seems to find trouble everywhere he turns. After a long, tumultuous journey, in which Pinocchio is accosted by two corrupt thieves, turned into a donkey, and swallowed by a shark, Pinocchio is reunited with his father, setting up a final challenge that will prove once and for all if Pinocchio has the heart to become a real boy.

Benigni's follow-up to the Oscar-winning LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL is a crowd-pleasing fantasy film, featuring beautiful cinematography from Dante Spinotti (HEAT, L.A. CONFIDENTIAL). The American release boasts the voices of actors Breckin Meyer, Glenn Close, and John Cleese.

3. Crossover

Director and screenwriter Preston A. Whitmore II (THE WALKING DEAD) captures the phenomenon of streetball and brings it to the big screen in this tale about two old friends whose lives seem very different. Tech’s (Anthony Mackie) dream is to play basketball, but he isn’t quite right for the NBA and he can’t play college ball since he served time in his senior year and is studying for the GED. Instead, he plays the occasional game in an abandoned Detroit train station and hustles players all around the city with his friend Up (Lil J.J.) for quick cash. Meanwhile, his best buddy, Cruise (Wesley Jonathan), is a talented player who has been sweet-talked by agents and left with nothing--except the realization that education is everything. He’s counting on a basketball scholarship to a California university and a career in medicine--rather than his ball-playing ability--as the key to his future.

Life becomes more complicated when Cruise repays a favor to Tech and puts his scholarship at risk by playing streetball on his pal’s team in a game arranged by Vaughn (Wayne Brady), a former sports agent. Amazed by what he sees on the court, Vaughn is soon trying to woo Cruise with NBA promises, much to the delight of his new girlfriend, Vanessa (Eva Pigford, winner of AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL), who can only see dollar signs. When the unthinkable happens, Cruise and Tech learn that they are not that different after all, and that their friendship can withstand anything. Real streetball players, including Phillip "Hot Sauce" Champion, who plays the greedy and arrogant local streetball champ, Jewelz, are used throughout the film, which features plenty of riveting action. Alecia Fears also stars as Tech’s girlfriend, Eboni.

2. Alone in the Dark

You wake up in the middle of the night with the feeling someone is in the room with you. You get a flash of panic as you fumble for your bedside lamp. But when you turn on the light, no one is there.

You might feel safe…but just because you can't see something doesn't mean it's not there. Watching. Waiting. Existing at the fragile boundaries of our perception. There is a world around us, a world most of us never see - or never want to see.

As a child, Edward Carnby was given irrefutable proof of that world. He hasn't slept well since. Now, twenty years later, Edward is a paranormal investigator. When the irrational and the inexplicable become undeniable, he is there. He is not out to change your mind. But he may be the only one who can save your life.

Now, the greatest mystery of Edward's past is about to become the most dangerous case he has ever faced. Nineteen people have disappeared, and they have only one thing in common - each one grew up in the same orphanage as Edward. Looking for answers, Edward learns that an ancient artifact of considerable power has been discovered in a long-lost shipwreck. Amidst mounting danger, he turns to Aline Cedrac, a brilliant anthropologist who's also his ex-flame - and the only person he really trusts.

In a world of ancient evils, lost civilizations, shadowy government conspiracies, and deadly paranormal threats, Edward and Aline come together to confront a supernatural enemy unlike anything they've ever seen before…one whose very existence could threaten all of humankind. -- © Lions Gate Films

1. Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

In the mystifying opening sequence of BALLISTIC: ECKS VS. SEVER, a double kidnapping takes place on a rainy night in Vancouver with a minimal amount of wasted time and a maximum amount of violence. A little boy is picked up at the airport by his mother (Talisa Soto), whose car is stopped minutes later by thugs who steal the boy and say they're taking him to his father. Rounding the corner, the thugs see a car explode in front of them, and a dump truck smashes into a wall of other cars, spraying fire. A hooded martial arts expert takes out the thugs with some impressive kicks and swirls, then grabs the boy and leaves. Secret agent Sever (Lucy Liu) is the kidnapper here, an angry, heavily armed nut who literally goes ballistic for unknown reasons. Using automatic weapons and other highly explosive artillery, she annihilates at least a hundred policeman in the next scene, outside a shopping mall. A retired secret agent, Ecks (Antonio Banderas), is the only man who can stop her, and when he does--temporarily--the two join forces against the real culprit, Robert Gant (Gregg Henry). Gant has crafted a dangerous assassination weapon that triggers death at the push of a button once it is injected into its victim's bloodstream. And that weapon is living inside the little boy. To save him, and stop the weapon from being used again, Ecks and Sever must get Gant. BALLISTIC: ECKS VS. SEVER is a super-violent nonstop action extravaganza with a high-octane musical score by Don Davis. It is directed by Kaos.


If you ever have the chance to see any of these movies, viciously murder the person who recommended them.

Edited by Mega X.exe on November 5, 2007 at 0:27:50.

why?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Burger_King

*looks at Mega X's post*

Take it from someone who nearly killed himself by watching every movie on that list at some time or another. Pinnochio is worse than Ballistics...Not by much, but a 50 year old playing Pinnochio beats Ballistics any day.

Yeah, I kinda DO WANT.

Same here. GIMME THAT.