I've wondered a bit, while we're here, where are we going, what's the point, why is it so hard, tings like that, you know? It sounds like the lyrics to some Jack Johnson song (and they are), but still, I have to remark that all of it just seems beautiful. I believe in God ... you know? I believe in the sheer beauty of it all, all the stupid incongruences of everything, every blemish, every scar, every shade of black, blue, red, green, surreptitiously gray, all of it. I love it, I bask in it, I enjoy being a part of it.
I've heard people say...that God made us because He was lonely, but I don't buy that. God isn't a person, I don't see Him like that, I see God as a concept, an ideal, the perfect image of perfection, except, with a will.
Complete perfection, harmony, understanding. Sheer mastery over everything; the self, the world, everything. God wouldn't be lonely, because God is really three, right? That, the Father is the Will of God, and the Son is the Law of God, and the Holy spirit is like God's little messenger, God's connection to us, you know? I listen a lot to what my friends tell me about all of this, and I rarely ever say anything, but I just find it all so beautiful.
They say that God is Love, or that God loves us, or that, well, we are made and saved because God loves us. But, why? Why would He love us? I- I just don't get it. No, I do, I really do get it.
We're his Art, you know? Little sculptures, little bits of paint, little poems and beautiful structures and complex figures and everything, just one big tapestry of sheer art. It's beautiful. That's why God loves us, right? Because, we're His artwork, right? We belong to Him. But ... that's so sad, that He would just ...... own us, you know?
So, he gave us a choice, a wonderful choice, be His, or not. Isn't that beautiful? I ... I love it, I think it's beautiful.
We can be beautiful, we can be ugly, we can scar, we can paint, we can be Art, or we can be some horrible splotch on the canvas, but we're never erased. We're never forgotten, because He looks at us, he's there, watching, poking, asking us to be this color, or telling us to paint over that color.
Or we can choose not to, and color ourselves, though we're more likely to color ourselves black.
You know, I think it's really beautiful, you know?
I ... I'm in Love, right now. It's weird, how I was sooo, depressed. I thought I lost Love, but God gave it back to me. It's beautiful, and I just wanted to say so.
Ah, the Truth. It's out there ... nah, maybe not.